如何用中国特有的语言风格翻译《冰与火之歌》？

我琢磨了一下，还是劳动人民爱听的评书和单口相声土一点。

先拿第一部的介绍为基础下刀

Summers span decades. Winter can last a lifetime. And the struggle for the Iron Throne has begun.

As Warden of the north, Lord Eddard Stark counts it a curse when King Robert bestows on him the office of the Hand. His honour weighs him down at court where a true man does what he will, not what he must … and a dead enemy is a thing of beauty.

The old gods have no power in the south, Stark’s family is split and there is treachery at court. Worse, the vengeance-mad heir of the deposed Dragon King has grown to maturity in exile in the Free Cities. He claims the Iron Throne.

伤情最是晚凉天,憔悴斯人不堪怜。 邀酒摧肠三杯醉,寻香惊梦五更寒。 钗头凤斜卿有泪,荼蘼花了我无缘。 小楼寂寞心宇月,也难如钩也难圆。

念几句定场诗，今天咱们讲一段魏斯忒大陆的故事。

这魏斯忒大陆在哪儿，谁也不知道，但那地方和咱们这儿大不一样，咱们这儿一年分春夏秋冬四季，他们那儿一季可得好几十年！这么说吧，孩子在冬天生下来，可能到老死也还没见过夏天。您想想，这老百姓能不苦么？这公子王孙能闲得住么？咱要讲的就是这么一段诸侯叛乱。

在这魏斯忒大陆北边，长城脚下有座临冬城，城里有座靖北侯府。这靖北侯姓史，叫史爱德，娶了一位夫人是奔流城屠侯爷家的大小姐。夫妇二人是举案齐眉，伉俪情深。史屠氏是儿女上有福的人，一共生养了三位少爷，两位小姐。一家人是和和美美，热热闹闹。可有一天啊，这就出事了。

出了什么事呢？这魏斯忒大陆的皇帝白劳波在京城坐不住了，突然说要上史侯爷这地儿来巡视一趟。白劳波没当上皇帝那会和史侯爷是发小，还差点管史侯爷叫了大舅哥。这又是君臣又是故交，史侯爷能不让他来么？于是府上是杀猪宰羊，张灯结彩，心想着是好好招待这天家，别惹出乱子来。

不想皇上来了就下了一道口谕给史侯爷，让他随銮驾进京任职，要封给他一个大丞相。咱们想着进京当相爷不是天大的好事么？可是史家就犯嘀咕了。这家里这么多事不能没人管，屠夫人走不得，这一大帮孩子全跟着上京也不方便。屠夫人疼丈夫疼孩子是愁得夜不能寐。史侯爷也成天不见笑脸儿，自己总觉得是祸要来了，心说我的陛下啊我的弟兄，你这是难为我！可是君命难违，这史家再不乐意也还是收拾收拾赴任去了。

史侯爷这个人啊，那可是茅房拉屎脸朝外的汉子，说一不二，宁折不弯。打仗没得说，做官可未必行。这人啊，想要做官出仕，光有能耐可不够，还得会通融。史侯爷恰恰就是差了这一点，他认准了什么事对那是非这么干不可，哪管得罪不得罪人。所以这史侯爷刚上京不到一年，就被正宫皇后兰氏和她手下一帮奸臣佞党给设计谋害了。可怜史侯爷一世清白，忠心不二，竟落了个枭首示众、家破人亡的下场。

皇上驾崩，史侯爷殒命，跟着史侯爷进京的两位姐儿就是羊入虎口。大姐史珊莎被那兰娘娘软禁宫中，备受欺凌。小妹史艾娅流落街头，远走他乡。史侯爷的死讯传到北边去，他家的大少爷史罗柏在父亲灵前哭倒三回，发誓要素盔素甲杀进京城，为父报仇。啊呀，这不是要造反么？！

不过说回来，这白家的天下也是造反抢来的。前朝王家本来姓谭，在海外发家，有秘传御龙之术。那龙杀过来，人能挡得住么？管你多高的武艺，全白给！所以谭家一路摧枯拉朽，直取京城，黄袍加身。不过这谭家皇帝非同一般，他那金銮殿上放的不是龙椅，是一把铁椅子。您该问，皇上怎么坐铁椅子呢？不嫌凉么？因为这铁椅子是用开国高祖皇帝打败的这些魏斯忒的老王公贵胄的剑化在一块铸起来的！意思就是说，你不是不服我么，可是哪个也得乖乖让我坐屁股底下。可是这皇位不是那么好坐的，古往今来多少朝代都是头几年励精图治，坐稳了就骄奢淫逸。谭家王朝也不例外，是一代不如一代，龙也渐渐都养死了，御龙之术也失传了，还出了一位暴虐堪比商纣王的亡国之君。史爱德的父亲史老侯爷当年就是被这暴君活活烧死在大堂上。史侯爷的妹子史来娜本来许给了白劳波，也被太子谭雷伽给生生霸占了去。这史、白两家世子正值年轻气盛的时候，一怒之下就举旗造反了。谭家一旦没了看门的御龙之术，可就再也压制不住天下人了，锦绣河山顿时刀兵四起，天家富贵落个满门鬼哭，就剩了一位皇子和一位公主逃出生天，远下南洋。

这谭家最后一点血脉本该相依为命，无奈这位皇子谭威赛是个狼心狗肺的祸害，不学无术，成天只想着去夺回他谭家的皇位，从小对这唯一的嫡亲妹妹非打即骂。打了还不认，说自己是真龙天子，挨了他的打便是挨了龙的打。这不是痴人说梦是什么？谭丹妮公主好不容易熬到及笄之年，谭威赛竟然为了招兵买马把金枝玉叶卖给了穷凶极恶的朵思蛮人头目。

这才引出一场滔天大祸！

后来想到红色婚礼很适合村化。

The drums were pounding again, pounding and pounding and pounding.

Dacey Mormont, who seemed to be the only woman left in the hall besides Catelyn, stepped up behind Edwyn Frey, and touched him lightly on the arm as she said something in his ear. Edwyn wrenched himself away from her with unseemly violence. ‘‘No,’’ he said, too loudly. ‘‘I’m done with dancing for the nonce.’’ Dacey paled and turned away. Catelyn got slowly to her feet. What just happened there? Doubt gripped her heart, where an instant before had been only weariness. It is nothing, she tried to tell herself, you are seeing grumkins in the woodpile, youare become an old silly woman sick with grief and fear. But something must have shown on her face. Even Ser Wendel Manderly took note. ‘‘Is something amiss?’’ he asked, the leg of lamb in his hands.

上回咱们讲到这屠德慕替外甥去傅家娶亲，不想这傅家上下腌臜，竟也生出傅丝霖那么一个如花似玉的女娇娥。这屠家大爷喜出望外，欢欢喜喜拜完天地就入了洞房。同来迎亲的大小伙子哪个肯这么放他去快活，一窝蜂跟着捣乱去了。

只听谯楼上鼓打三更，屠夫人旁边就剩了莫大娘子一个女客。只见莫大娘子起身去那傅德温身边去咬耳朵说要和他比划两招，傅德温一胳膊甩开大娘子，嗷一嗓子说：“我早不干那号事了！”把莫娘子弄了个大红脸。屠夫人瞅见这情形突然起了疑心，就觉得这其中肯定是有什么见不得人的。可是喜酒还没喝完，大伙儿还都在席上，屠夫人只好劝自己静静心，别瞎想。可这人心里一旦有事，脸上就变颜变色的。对过的满文德瞧见连羊腿都放下不啃了，问：“屠夫人，你这是咋回事啊？”

She did not answer him. Instead she went after Edwyn Frey. The players in the gallery had finally gotten both king and queen down to their name-day suits. With scarcely a moment’s respite, they began to play a very different sort of song. No one sang the words, but Catelyn knew ‘‘The Rains of Castamere’’ when she heard it. Edwyn was hurrying toward a door. She hurried faster, driven by the music. Six quick strides and she caught him. And who are you, the proud lord said, that I must bow solow? She grabbed Edwyn by the arm to turn him and went cold all over when she felt the iron rings beneath his silken sleeve.

屠夫人没敢答应老满，倒是起身悄么声地跟着傅德温，看看他去干什么。堂上那些吹鼓手这当口恰好换了一支曲，名唤《卡梅夜雨》。诸位，这歌虽雅，可是忒不吉利，唱的是一桩盛极转衰、惨遭灭门的真人真事。傅德温急冲冲就往门口去，屠夫人连忙跟上一把把他揪住。哎哟喂，这一揪不要紧，屠夫人的心就凉了个透，赶情这姓傅的锦袍底下穿着锁子甲！喜宴上穿锁甲他是防谁的？他家这是要害人啊！

Catelyn slapped him so hard she broke his lip. Olyvar, she thought, and Perwyn, Alesander, all absent. And Roslin wept . . .

屠夫人立马火冲头顶，劈脸就给傅德温一个耳刮子，打得他嘴都出血了。可是这有什么用呢？几个中用的人全闹洞房去了，一个也不在身边。

Edwyn Frey shoved her aside. The music drowned all other sound, echoing off the walls as if the stones themselves were playing. Robb gave Edwyn an angry look and moved to block his way... and staggered suddenly as a quarrel sprouted from his side, just beneath the shoulder. If he screamed then, the sound was swallowed by the pipes and horns and fiddles. Catelyn saw a second bolt pierce his leg, saw him fall. Up in the gallery, half the musicians had crossbows in their hands instead of drums or lutes. She ran toward her son, until something punched in the small of the back and the hard stone floor came up to slap her. ‘‘Robb!’’ she screamed. She saw Smalljon Umber wrestle a table off its trestles. Crossbow bolts thudded into the wood, one two three, as he flung it down on top of his king. Robin Flint was ringed by Freys, their daggers rising and falling. Ser Wendel Manderly rose ponderously to his feet, holding his leg of lamb. A quarrel went in his open mouth and came out the back of his neck. Ser Wendel crashed forward, knocking the table off its trestles and sending cups, flagons, trenchers, platters, turnips, beets, and wine bouncing, spilling, and sliding across the floor.

傅德温把屠夫人拨拉到一边，自个走了。这大少爷史罗柏一旁冷眼望见可不乐意了，心想我娘是正宗一品诰命夫人还是你们亲家，是让你这么个拨拉法的？！我可得跟你理论理论，教教你待客的规矩！这么想着史大少爷就站起来了，走了没两步就觉肩下嗖地一凉。楼上吹鼓手只管越吹越热闹，这屋里就听不见别的动静。屠夫人听不见儿子叫唤，可是瞧得真切，老大已经中了两支冷箭，眼看就要往地上倒。原来楼上乐师里埋伏着弓箭手！她拔腿就往儿子身边跑，不知被谁推翻在地，摔得是眼冒金星。屠夫人急得没等爬起来就冲那边直喊“儿啊，快跑！”安小景一腿踢起一张饭桌子来，只听“啪啪啪”三声，桌子面上就中了三箭。安小景赶紧把这桌子让史大爷顶着，林洛宾却让傅家的人抹肩头拢二背给捆上了。满文德刚回过神站起来，还没忘了那条羊腿呢，一支箭就从嘴里钻进去从后脖子穿出来。把这老满疼得是两手乱扒拉，桌上的酒菜碗碟砸得遍地都是。

Catelyn’s back was on fire. I have to reach him. The Smalljon bludgeoned Ser Raymund Frey across the face with a leg of mutton. But when he reached for his sword belt a crossbow bolt drove him to his knees. In a coat of gold or a coat of red, a lion still has claws. She saw Lucas Blackwood cut down by Ser Hosteen Frey. One of the Vances was hamstrung by Black Walder as he was wrestling with Ser Harys Haigh. And mine are long and sharp, my lord, as long and sharp as yours. The crossbows took Donnel Locke, Owen Norrey, and half a dozen more. Young Ser Benfrey had seized Dacey Mormont by the arm, but Catelyn saw her grab up a flagon of wine with her other hand, smash it full in his face, and run for the door. It flew open before she reached it. Ser Ryman Frey pushed into the hall, clad in steel from helm to heel. A dozen Frey men-at-arms packed the door behind him. They were armed with heavy long axes.

屠夫人急得屁股都烧着了得快到儿子身边去啊。这边小景一羊腿打了傅雷莽一个趔趄，腾出手去拔刀时一箭正中膝盖，扑通就跪下了。屠夫人四处看看，这周围死的死，伤的伤，都打成一锅粥了！史家好汉已经折损大半。就莫大娘子躲得快，拿酒壶左右打出一条路，头一个跑到门边上。不想傅力蛮正带着大小兄弟在门外堵着。

‘‘Mercy!’’ Catelyn cried, but horns and drums and the clash of steel smothered her plea. Ser Ryman buried the head of his axe in Dacey’s stomach. By then men were pouring in the other doors as well, mailed men in shaggy fur cloaks with steel in their hands. Northmen! She took them for rescue for half a heartbeat, till one of them struck the Smalljon’s head off with two huge blows of his axe. Hope blew out like a candle in a storm.

“菩萨保佑！”屋里又吹又打，屠夫人自己耳朵也听不见自己喊的佛号。傅力蛮一斧头把莫大娘子劈作两半，带人冲进屋里。屠夫人还指望有人救驾，就见小景的脑袋也让这力蛮两斧头砍飞出去。

In the midst of slaughter, the Lord of the Crossing sat on his carved oaken throne, watching greedily.

下面刀光血影，只有那傅老爷子坐在席上瞅着直乐。

There was a dagger on the floor a few feet away. Perhaps it had skittered there when the Smalljon knocked the table off its trestles, or perhaps it had fallen from the hand of some dying man. Catelyn crawled toward it. Her limbs were leaden, and the taste of blood was in her mouth. I will kill Walder Frey, she told herself. Jinglebell was closer to the knife, hiding under a table, but he only cringed away as she snatched up the blade. I will kill the old man, I can do that much at least.

屠夫人突见地上一把杀猪刀，许是小景或者哪个死鬼掉在这的。夫人也不顾了，爬过去捡起这刀，心想老娘不杀了你这老不死的垫背！那金铃儿正钻在桌子底下躲着，刀就在脚边上却拿眼瞅着另一边。屠夫人正好一手抢过。

Then the tabletop that the Smalljon had flung over Robb shifted, and her son struggled to his knees. He had an arrow in his side, a second in his leg, a third through his chest. Lord Walder raised a hand, and the music stopped, all but one drum. Catelyn heard the crash of distant battle, and closer the wild howling of a wolf. Grey Wind, she remembered too late. ‘‘Heh,’’ Lord Walder cackled at Robb, ‘‘the King in the North arises. Seems we killed some of your men, Your Grace. Oh, but I’ll make you an apology, that will mend them all again, heh.’’

外面人嘶马喊，隐约还传来几声狼叫。屠夫人气得直咬牙根，咋忘了还带着这畜牲呢？这时，小景给罗柏扣的那张桌子动了，史大爷爬起来，胁下腿上胸前各中一箭。傅老爷子抬了抬手，那吹鼓手就都停了，只剩了一个打小咣咣的还打得热闹。老傅头一脸皮笑肉不笑，慢悠悠说：“哟，靖北王这是起来了？我家刚才倒是杀了王爷手下不少人呢，老夫这就给小殿下赔罪，呵呵”

Catelyn grabbed a handful of Jinglebell Frey’s long grey hair and dragged him out of his hiding place. ‘‘Lord Walder!’’ she shouted. ‘‘LORDWALDER!’’ The drum beat slow and sonorous, doom boom doom. ‘‘Enough,’’ said Catelyn. ‘‘Enough, I say. You have repaid betrayal with betrayal, let it end.’’ When she pressed her dagger to Jinglebell’s throat, the memory of Bran’s sickroom came back to her, with the feel of steel at her own throat. The drum went boom doom boom doom boom doom. ‘‘Please,’’ she said. ‘‘He is my son. My first son, and my last. Let him go. Let him go and I swear we will forget this . . . forget all you’ve done here. I swear it by the old gods and new, we . . . we will take no vengeance . . .’’

屠夫人扯看着金铃儿头发从桌子底下拖出来，高声喝道：“傅老瓦！老瓦罐子你够了！我们以前是对不住你，你今日也讨回来了！”屠夫人刀架在金铃儿脖子上，说：“我们家统共就剩这么一个独苗，你要是肯放了我大儿子，让他活命，不论屠家还是史家日后必不与你计较！皇天在上，我屠凯琳拉了屎从不往回坐！”

Lord Walder peered at her in mistrust. ‘‘Only a fool would believe such blather. D’you take me for a fool, my lady?’’

傅老瓦冷言说：“二傻子才信你那皇天！你这娘们也不是耍我一回了！”

‘‘I take you for a father. Keep me for a hostage, Edmure as well if you haven’t killed him. But let Robb go.’’

屠夫人道：“都是当爹当娘的人，只要你肯放了我儿，我和他舅留下凭你发落！”

‘‘No.’’ Robb’s voice was whisper faint. ‘‘Mother, no . . .’’

史大爷这回离气若游丝也不远了，听见屠夫人这话急得直哭：“我的亲娘你可别呀！”

‘‘Yes. Robb, get up. Get up and walk out, please, please. Save yourself . . . if not for me, for Jeyne.’’

“儿砸，赶紧爬起来走，算娘求你，好死不如赖活着，不为了娘还为了媳妇呢！”

‘‘Jeyne?’’ Robb grabbed the edge of the table and forced himself to stand. ‘‘Mother,’’ he said, ‘‘Grey Wind...’’

“媳妇？”史大爷扶着桌子边站起来，说：“娘，我那狼⋯”

‘‘Go to him. Now. Robb, walk out of here.’’

“快找你狼去，赶紧逃命！”

Lord Walder snorted. ‘‘And why would I let him do that?’’

傅老瓦鼻子一哼：“你当我傻是怎么着？”

She pressed the blade deeper into Jinglebell’s throat. The lackwit rolled his eyes at her in mute appeal. A foul stench assailed her nose, but she paid it no more mind than she did the sullen ceaseless pounding of that drum, boom doom boom doom boom doom. Ser Ryman and Black Walder were circling round her back, but Catelyn did not care. They could do as they wished with her; imprison her, rape her, kill her, it made no matter. She had lived too long, and Ned was waiting. It was Robb she feared for. ‘‘On my honor as a Tully,’’ she told Lord Walder, ‘‘on my honor as a Stark, I will trade your boy’s life for Robb’s. A son for a son.’’ Her hand shook so badly she was ringing Jinglebell’s head.

屠夫人又把刀刃儿往金铃儿脖子上比了比。这呆子光动眼也不知道出声。傅力蛮和黑老瓦已从后面包抄过来，屠夫人也顾不上了心说让他们抓了也就罢了，杀了剐了随他们便，正好上阴间见史侯爷去。要不是为了儿子，早活腻了。屠夫人道：“我们史家屠家都是名门大户，从不哄人！我拿你儿子换我儿子，一命换一命你总得答应吧！”

Boom, the drum sounded, boom doom boom doom. The old man’s lips went in and out. The knife trembled in Catelyn’s hand, slippery with sweat. ‘‘A son for a son, heh,’’ he repeated. ‘‘But that’s a grandson . . . and he never was much use.’’

打小锣的那个手还没停。老傅头动了动嘴皮子：“儿子换儿子倒是在理，但你抓的那个特么是个孙子，还是个十不全！我早不想要这废物了！”

A man in dark armor and a pale pink cloak spotted with blood stepped up to Robb. ‘‘Jaime Lannister sends his regards.’’ He thrust his longsword through her son’s heart, and twisted.

一个黑甲白袍的䠀着地上的血上前拔刀，噌地扎了史大爷一个透心凉。“这刀是兰瞻目给你的！”

Robb had broken his word, but Catelyn kept hers. She tugged hard on Aegon’s hair and sawed at his neck until the blade grated on bone. Blood ran hot over her fingers. His little bells were ringing, ringing, ringing, and the drum went boom doom boom.

史少爷一死，屠夫人就疯了，一刀把金铃儿拉了个开皮见骨头。

Finally someone took the knife away from her. The tears burned like vinegar as they ran down her cheeks. Ten fierce ravens were raking her face with sharp talons and tearing off strips of flesh, leaving deep furrows that ran red with blood. She could taste it on her lips.

杀了金铃儿，这屠夫人也扛不住了，刀什么时候没的都不知道，只觉得眼前一群黑老鸹在自己身上撕肉吃。

It hurts so much, she thought. Our children, Ned, all our sweet babes. Rickon, Bran, Arya, Sansa, Robb . . . Robb . . . please, Ned, please, make it stop, make it stop hurting . . . The white tears and the red ones ran together until her face was torn and tattered, the face that Ned had loved. Catelyn Stark raised her hands and watched the blood run down her long fingers, over her wrists, beneath the sleeves of her gown. Slow red worms crawled along her arms and under her clothes. It tickles. That made her laugh until she screamed. ‘‘Mad,’’ someone said, ‘‘she’s lost her wits,’’ and someone else said, ‘‘Make an end,’’ and a hand grabbed her scalp just as she’d done with Jinglebell, and she thought, No, don’t, don’t cut my hair, Ned loves my hair. Then the steel was at her throat, and its bite was red and cold.

侯爷啊，咱们这儿女一个接一个都没了，侯爷你睁睁眼，你这心尖儿老大也没了。这是作了什么孽啊，我可怎么去见你啊！屠夫人这脸上连血带泪都没个人样了，身上也早就被血泡成红的了。旁人只见这屠夫人一阵哭一阵笑，都说这娘们是疯了吧？又有人说那不如给她个痛快！屠夫人这厢只觉头皮一紧，骂道“哪个王八羔子敢剪你姑奶奶头发？我这头发只有侯爷一人动得！”话音未落，屠夫人喉咙一凉，红光四溅。可怜江湖上头一位泼辣豪爽的女当家连同少年出世的大公子，双双命丧傅家楼上。

其实我一直觉得应该把故事翻译成中国仙侠小说风格才对味。

瓦雷利亚钢——玄铁剑；

瑟曦——曦太后；

北境野人——狄人；

龙焰Dracarys——三昧真火；

瓦里斯——王公公（掌管东厂，耳目众多）；

光之王——光明天尊；

千面之神 Many-Faced God——千相天尊/无量身天尊；

无面者——无相行者；

北境守护——镇北侯；

lord stark——史大公/史国公（子女称为史公子，史二公子，史大小姐，史二小姐）；

异鬼（白鬼）others(white walkers)——阴兵/白无常；

夜王night's king——暗日阎罗；

国王之手hand of the king——太师（比如提利昂·兰尼斯特就叫兰太师）/丞相/首辅；

御林铁卫King‘s guard——禁军/御前侍卫；

三眼乌鸦——天眼金乌/天眼神鸦；

守夜人——戍夜武士；

森林之子——木精童子；

红毒蛇——赤练太子；

魔山——须弥太岁；

King's landing君临——王畿；

自由兄弟会——逍遥帮；

无旗兄弟会——勤王帮（打着劳勃国王旗号反抗兰氏篡权）；

龙——大威天龙；

伤心领——大悲地；

Your grace——主公（例：主公，切不可轻征王畿，以失民心。昂闻之，极北苦寒之地，有暗日阎罗，领阴兵十万，不日且南征中原。为今之计，不若与镇北王盟于长城，藉大威天龙三昧真火，一举荡灭阎氏，则万民归心，王畿不战而可下也，此为最善之策。）；

总主教——护国大法师（评论区贡献）/大国师；

大麻雀——雀力国师；

蝎子弩——神机箭（评论区贡献）；

金袍子——锦衣卫（评论区贡献）/虎贲军。